Cruisers are a friendly bunch… right up until someone saves six sunbeds with a pair of flip-flops and disappears for three hours.
Spend enough time at sea and you start noticing the little things people do that quietly drive everyone else mad. Some are annoying. Some are baffling. A few should probably be banned altogether, or at least that’s what people will say!
And while nobody likes to admit they complain onboard, cruise passengers can turn almost anything into a heated debate by day three…
1. Chair Hogs at Sunrise
There’s something that’s actually almost impressive about the dedication of cruise chair hogs!
While most passengers are still asleep, these determined early risers are already marching onto the pool deck at dawn, strategically placing towels, books and the occasional lonely flip-flop across an entire row of loungers.
The real frustration isn’t just the saved chairs – it’s that half of them stay empty until lunchtime. Because once they’ve reserved their loungers, those cruisers will nip back to bed, or go enjoy a leisurely breakfast, or even head ashore if the ship’s in port!
Cruise lines constantly threaten crackdowns, but the towel wars continue on practically every sailing. Nothing sparks passive-aggressive muttering faster than watching somebody stroll back to their “reserved” lounger four hours later with zero shame whatsoever.
Suggested read: 11 Ways I Beat Chair Hogs On Cruises
2. People Who Stop Dead in Corridors
Cruise ships somehow turn perfectly normal adults into people who abruptly stop in the middle of walkways like they’ve hit an invisible forcefield.
Maybe they’re checking the daily planner. Maybe they’re deciding where to eat. Maybe they’ve spotted a friend three decks away. Whatever the reason, there’s always somebody causing a human traffic jam outside the buffet entrance.
The problem gets even worse on mega ships where thousands of passengers are all trying to move around at once. Suddenly one family stopping side-by-side becomes the maritime version of a motorway pile-up.
Bonus annoyance points if they stop directly outside an elevator. Those guys are awesome…
3. Buffet Queue Jumpers
Cruise buffets can sometimes feel like fascinating social experiments. Most passengers politely shuffle along, waiting their turn for scrambled eggs or roast potatoes. Then there’s always one person who treats the whole thing like supermarket sweep.
Queue jumpers appear from nowhere. They squeeze into tiny gaps. They hover awkwardly beside trays waiting for fresh food to arrive before anyone else can grab it.
And somehow, despite buffet layouts being almost identical across cruise lines, there’s always confusion about where the queue actually starts.
I don’t actually mind a queue-jumper if they’re just nipping in for one or two items. After all, the queue for the bacon my stetch right past the mushrooms, so if you just want mushrooms, go for it. As long as you’re respectful and don’t aggressively push in!
4. Loud Balcony Neighbours
Balconies are supposed to be peaceful little private escapes. But there’s often a decent chance your neighbours will treat theirs like an all-night pub garden.
Some passengers genuinely seem unaware that sound travels incredibly easily between balconies. Conversations, phone calls, music and drunken late-night chats drift straight through the partitions.
Then there are the smokers who technically aren’t supposed to be smoking out there, but somehow think nobody notices. We do notice, though.
The worst offenders are the groups who decide midnight is the perfect time for balcony drinks and storytelling. Lovely for them. Less lovely for the people next door trying to sleep before an early excursion.
Suggested read: 9 Cruise Balcony Mistakes That Could Get You in Serious Trouble
5. The Elevator Standoff
Cruise ship elevators bring out survival instincts nobody knew they had.
You’ll wait patiently for several minutes watching full lifts arrive one after another while people inside refuse to move an inch away from the buttons. Then finally one arrives with space for three people… and somehow eight still attempt to squeeze in.
There’s also an unwritten battle over whether to wait or simply take the stairs. On sea days especially, elevators become strangely emotional places.
And somehow there’s always one child repeatedly pressing every single deck button while their parents stare into the middle distance pretending not to notice.
One complaint that is definitely justified though – those people who try to cram into an elevator before letting people get off. Just wait 10 seconds!
6. Theatre Seat Savers
Saving one extra theatre seat for your partner? Fair enough.
Saving twelve seats with cardigans, handbags and cocktails while your entire group finishes dinner elsewhere? Straight to cruise jail.
The pre-show scramble in cruise theatres can get surprisingly intense, especially on newer ships with popular productions, or on ships where the theatres aren’t the biggest. People arrive ridiculously early to claim prime spots, only to defend entire empty rows like security guards.
It becomes even more irritating when late arrivals expect everyone to shuffle around mid-performance so their giant group can sit together. Or worse is when they don’t turn up, leaving the seats empty when others have had to miss out!
Nobody wants to become territorial over seats on holiday. And yet somehow cruise entertainment has a magical ability to turn grown adults feral.
7. Kids Treating the Ship Like a Playground
Most kids onboard are absolutely fine. You barely notice them. Then there are the ones sprinting through corridors at full speed at midnight while slamming cabin doors hard enough to shake neighbouring walls.
Cruise ships naturally give children freedom they don’t usually get at home, which is partly why families love cruising. But occasionally that freedom turns into total chaos while exhausted parents quietly give up trying to intervene. Or they just don’t seem to care at all in the first place.
Stairwells become playgrounds. Elevators become amusement rides. Hot tubs become unofficial swimming lessons.
Nobody expects children to sit silently all cruise long. But there’s definitely a line between “having fun” and “running completely wild across Deck 12”.
8. People Using Speakerphone by the Pool
For reasons science may never fully explain, some cruise passengers genuinely believe the entire pool deck wants to hear their video call.
Maybe it’s a friend back home. Maybe it’s somebody loudly discussing dinner plans. Either way, nobody relaxing beside the pool needs accidental front-row access to someone else’s conversation.
Music played through phone speakers is equally bad. Especially when several people decide to do it at once, creating a strange overlapping soundtrack of dance music, TikTok clips and muffled FaceTime calls.
Cruise ships already have enough background noise without passengers personally contributing to it through terrible phone speakers.
Headphones exist for a reason, people.
9. Unlimited Drink Package Behaviour
Drink packages can absolutely be worth it. Unfortunately they also inspire some truly fascinating behaviour by day two.
Suddenly passengers who barely drink at home become determined to “get their money’s worth” from sunrise cocktails onwards. Pool bars turn chaotic. Frozen drinks appear before breakfast. Somebody always ends up loudly insisting they’re “not even tipsy” while walking sideways.
Most people on a cruise handle drink packages perfectly responsibly. But every cruise has at least a few passengers treating the unlimited cocktails like an Olympic endurance challenge nobody asked for and it does spoil the fun a bit.
10. Cabin Door Slammers
Cruise cabin doors are surprisingly heavy, and this is something everyone discovers approximately once.
And then there’s those handful of passengers who just never seem to learn.
At all hours of the day and night, corridor silence is interrupted by enormous slams echoing deck after deck. Early risers heading for excursions. Late-night wanderers returning from the casino. Families repeatedly entering and exiting adjoining cabins every five minutes.
It’s one of those cruise annoyances that sounds minor until you’re trying to sleep and the cabin opposite appears determined to recreate a SWAT raid at 6am.
The strange part is that people often don’t realise they’re doing it. Meanwhile half the corridor quietly hates them by day four.
11. People Who Never Wash Their Hands
Cruise ships work incredibly hard to keep passengers healthy, which makes it so frustrating when some people completely ignore basic hygiene.
You know how some cruise lines actually pay people to stand outside a buffet and sing songs encouraging people to wash their hands? How have we got to a place where that person is needed?!
And still, some guests will just confidently stroll straight past. Others somehow leave public toilets without touching a sink once.
Then come the buffet horrors – grabbing pastries with bare hands, touching serving utensils after coughing, or letting children treat food stations like interactive exhibits. Yuck!
Nothing destroys your appetite faster than watching somebody sneeze into their hand before reaching for bread rolls. Cruise passengers love complaining about outbreaks onboard, but sometimes fellow guests are part of the problem.
12. Overcrowded Hot Tubs
Hot tubs onboard always look relaxing in promotional photos but there are never enough hot tubs to go around…
On sea days especially, hot tubs become mysteriously overcrowded from morning onwards. Sometimes they’re packed with loud groups clutching cocktails. Sometimes they’ve been unofficially claimed by children cannonballing endlessly while adults hover awkwardly nearby wondering whether to give up entirely.
And there’s always one person sitting directly beside the jets for two straight hours refusing to move. Which is worrying, when they’re often getting drinks.
How are they going to the bathroom? Oh.
13. Last-Minute Pier Runners
Every cruiser secretly loves watching pier runners. Nobody admits it, but it’s true. It’s properly fun.
There’s always a crowd lining upper decks filming late passengers sprinting dramatically toward the ship while security staff wait impatiently nearby.
To be fair, sometimes delays genuinely aren’t passengers’ fault. Traffic happens. Tours overrun. Ferry schedules collapse. But occasionally you can absolutely tell somebody ignored “all aboard” time because they wanted one final cocktail near the beach.
The reason people complain isn’t just the delay – it’s the stress. Nobody wants to wonder whether departure will be held up because someone lost track of time in Cozumel.
Still, everyone watches. And heaven forbid the pier runner acts like they don’t care. That’s when the booing starts!
14. The WiFi Complaints
Cruise WiFi has improved massively over the past few years, yet complaints about it somehow remain completely undefeated.
Guests expect flawless streaming in the middle of the ocean while thousands of other people attempt exactly the same thing simultaneously. Then outrage erupts when Instagram takes three extra seconds to load.
Older cruise internet packages were genuinely terrible, so some frustration is fair. But modern ships now offer speeds that would’ve seemed impossible not long ago.
Of course, that doesn’t stop people angrily testing connection speeds every hour before announcing to Facebook that “the WiFi onboard is unusable” using the very WiFi they claim doesn’t work.
15. People Wearing Swimwear in the Buffet
There’s always debate around cruise dress codes, but most passengers can agree on one thing – nobody really wants to see dripping swimwear beside the pasta station. This is another gross scenario and yet it happens!
Every sailing has at least a handful of guests wandering into the buffet barefoot and soaking wet straight from the pool deck. Sometimes without cover-ups. Occasionally without much else either.
It’s not about formal rules or being overdressed. It’s more the strange combination of wet swimsuits and self-service food areas that feels slightly chaotic. Crew rarely say much unless somebody pushes it too far, so the silent judging falls entirely to fellow passengers trying to enjoy lunch in peace.
16. Cruise Ducks Everywhere
Cruise ducks somehow became one of cruising’s strangest traditions. Some passengers absolutely love hiding tiny rubber ducks around ships for others to find. Families treat it like a floating treasure hunt. Kids get ridiculously excited spotting them tucked beside artwork or hidden near staircases.
Other passengers absolutely cannot stand them. To critics, cruise ducks are clutter. They create mess. They encourage people to crawl around public areas searching behind decorations like detectives in a crime drama.
The funniest part is how seriously both sides take it. Few cruise topics escalate faster online than innocent little rubber ducks mysteriously dividing the entire cruising community into opposing camps.
I’m fine with the duck craze, personally, though I won’t go out of my way to join in.
17. The Buffet Plate Pile-Up
Cruisers often behave very differently around “included” food, as if they’ve never been full before.
Even people who eat modestly at home suddenly return from evening shows carrying towering late-night buffet plates like they’re preparing for hibernation.
There’s always someone balancing pizza, chips, cake, noodles and ice cream simultaneously despite clearly only wanting half of it. Then tables end up abandoned with mountains of untouched food and melting desserts.
Part of it is excitement, just getting giddy at the variety of options available. Partly it’s the weird cruise mentality that encourages people to maximise absolutely everything. You have to get your money’s worth, right?!
Still, watching enormous amounts of wasted food being cleared away night after night can get surprisingly frustrating after a while. Especially when buffet queues are already packed.
Suggested read: New Royal Ships Will Revolutionise Waste Management
18. Overpriced Shore Excursions
Cruise line excursions regularly trigger the exact same conversation onboard.
“Yes, it’s expensive… but what if we miss the ship?”
Passengers know cruise-sponsored tours offer protection and convenience, but that doesn’t stop the sticker shock when prices appear in the planner. Suddenly a simple beach transfer somehow costs the same as a decent restaurant meal back home.
Then there’s the frustration when excursions feel rushed, overcrowded or overly commercialised once you actually arrive.
I use Shore Excursions Group, because their pricing is often much more competitive than the cruise lines’, and they’ll still always get you back to the ship. They have a guarantee – if you miss the ship, they’ll pay for you to meet it at the next port AND give you $1,000pp as an apology. Almost makes me want to miss the ship!
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19. Tender Queue Chaos
Tender ports always sound lovely in theory. Small boats ferrying passengers ashore to picturesque destinations feels wonderfully old-school cruise travel.
Until you’re stuck in a giant queue at 8am holding a numbered ticket while hundreds of equally impatient passengers slowly lose morale around you.
Tendering works reasonably well on smaller ships, but on larger vessels it can become painfully slow. Weather delays make everything worse. Mobility issues complicate things further. And once frustration starts building, the atmosphere changes quickly.
The thing is, you just have to learn to be patient. Trust me, you’ll get plenty of time ashore. Try to let that frustration go!
20. Motion at Sea
Cruise ships are enormous these days, but they still move. That’s generally how boats work.
Even so, every sailing seems to include passengers acting personally betrayed whenever the ocean behaves like… ocean.
OK, on very rare occasions it can be pretty bad…
But on a more typical cruise, even light vibrations become dramatic conversations in elevators. Mild swaying inspires frantic weather Googling. Somebody inevitably declares they “never felt movement like this before” despite cruising annually.
To be fair, seasickness genuinely can ruin trips for some people. But there’s always a difference between understandable discomfort and passengers demanding perfectly still conditions in the middle of the Atlantic.
Suggested read: Cruise Seasickness Tips That Actually Work
21. The Constant Upselling
Cruise lines have mastered the art of selling absolutely everything possible once you step onboard. This varies depending on who you’re sailing with, as some are worse than others, but even on one of the better lines, it’s not always fun to be reminded of extras you’ve not yet paid for.
Speciality dining. Spa packages. Bingo. Art auctions. Photography packages. Premium desserts. VIP seating. Extra attractions. Better drinks. Faster internet. More exclusive sun decks.
Occasionally it feels like you can’t walk ten metres without somebody trying to upgrade something.
Some cruisers genuinely don’t mind it because ignoring sales pitches becomes easy after day one. Others find the constant upselling exhausting, especially when cruises already aren’t cheap holidays to begin with.
The irony is that most people complaining about onboard spending will still somehow return home with a surprisingly large bill anyway.
22. Influencer Photo Shoots
Cruise ships are beautiful places and so naturally people want photos.
But there’s a growing category of passengers turning entire public areas into full-scale social media productions complete with outfit changes, portable lighting and dramatic slow-motion posing.
You’ll spot them blocking staircases, monopolising infinity pools or spending 40 uninterrupted minutes attempting the exact same sailaway shot while everybody awkwardly waits nearby.
Most people taking holiday photos aren’t bothering anyone. It’s the extreme versions that become unintentionally hilarious.
Yes, I’m technically a cruise influencer, and I do use my phone a lot. I usually get up at silly-o’clock in the morning to go film what I need when the ship is dead, so that a) I’m not annoying other guests, and b) it’s easier to film without having people walking in front of my shot. It works so much better.
23. Complaining About the Food… Then Going Back for More
Passengers complain the buffet is repetitive while returning three times daily. They declare desserts disappointing moments before ordering another two. Somebody loudly announces the pizza is “terrible” while actively eating a fourth slice.
Of course, food is subjective and not every meal onboard will be brilliant. But cruise ships feed thousands of people every single day, which is honestly quite impressive when you think about it.
The funniest complainers are usually the ones behaving like unpaid restaurant critics despite clearing every plate entirely.
24. The “Everything Was Better Before” Cruisers
Every cruise has at least one veteran passenger explaining how cruising peaked approximately 15 years ago.
The food used to be better. The service was better. The entertainment was better. Formal nights were better. Passengers were classier. Buffets were quieter. Sunbeds were easier to find. Everything, apparently, has declined dramatically since 2009.
To be fair, some complaints are valid. Cruising absolutely has changed over the years. But certain passengers seem determined to spend entire holidays mourning the golden age of cruising instead of enjoying the one they’re currently on.
Ironically, complaining about modern cruisers has quietly become one of cruising’s most enduring traditions itself.
Suggested read: 7 Annoying Cruise Cutbacks Passengers Can’t Stand
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Final Word
Cruise ships bring together thousands of people in a floating hotel with unlimited food, limited sunbeds and just enough cocktails to lower everybody’s patience levels slightly by day four. So honestly, it’s impressive things run as smoothly as they do.
Most of these annoyances are harmless, even if they inspire plenty of eye-rolling along the way. And the funny thing is, half the habits people complain about are probably things we’ve all done ourselves at some point – yes, even saving a theatre seat “just for two minutes”.
Still, if you can avoid slamming doors, hogging loungers and blasting TikToks by the pool, your fellow passengers will probably appreciate it.
And if not? At least you’ll give them something to complain about.
