Cruise ships are usually spotless, but some passengers? Not so much.
Crew members spend their days cleaning, polishing, sanitising, vacuuming and generally trying to keep thousands of people in check. But they can’t be everywhere at once. And as soon as you put that many humans together on one floating hotel, someone is going to do something that makes everyone else question civilisation.
From buffet crimes to hot tub horrors, these are some of the most disgusting things people say they’ve seen on cruise ships. You may never look at the self-serve tongs the same way again…
1. Walking Straight From The Toilet To The Buffet
One of the most common complaints from cruisers is also one of the simplest: people using the bathroom, skipping the sink, and heading straight for the buffet.
It’s grim anywhere, but on a cruise ship it feels even worse. You’re sharing serving spoons, handrails, lift buttons, drinks machines and sun loungers with thousands of other passengers.
This is exactly why cruise lines are so enthusiastic about handwashing stations. They’re not being dramatic – they’ve seen things.
2. Touching Buffet Food With Bare Hands
Cruise buffets are wonderful until you witness someone pick up a bread roll, inspect it, decide it’s not worthy, and put it back for the next unsuspecting passenger.
There are tongs. There are spoons. There are sometimes even crew members standing right there.
And yet, some people still treat the buffet like they’re rummaging through their own fridge at midnight.
The worst part is that you only know about the times you actually see it happen. Which is not a comforting thought.
3. Contaminating The Salad Dressing
Some buffet stories are so specific that they somehow become even worse. One cruiser said they watched a passenger wipe his nose, pick up a salad dressing container, cover the open spout with his finger, shake it, then put it back.
No. Absolutely not.
The passenger who saw it said they told staff immediately, which was definitely the right thing to do. Crew can remove contaminated items quickly, but only if someone actually lets them know.
And this is why many cruisers wish more buffet items were served by staff rather than handled by passengers.
4. Licking Fingers Before Touching The Tongs
The whole point of buffet tongs is that people don’t touch the food directly. Unfortunately, that plan falls apart when someone licks their fingers and then grabs the shared utensils.
It’s such a small act, but it instantly ruins the illusion that the buffet is under control.
A good tip? Use hand sanitiser after you’ve collected your food, not just before. You may have clean hands when you arrive, but then you’ve touched the same serving utensils as everyone else.
5. Using The Drinks Machine In Horrifying Ways
Cruise drinks stations usually have signs telling passengers not to press personal bottles directly against the dispenser. These signs exist because people do it anyway.
And then… there was the person who allegedly used the beverage dispenser to wash their hands.
That one deserves a moment of silence.
The drinks station is not a bathroom sink. It is not a bottle-cleaning station. It is not a tiny public shower for your fingers.
6. Putting Bare Feet On Tables
A buffet table is for plates, cups, cutlery and food. It is not for feet.
Cruise ships are relaxed places, and yes, you’ll see plenty of flip-flops, sandals and bare feet by the pool. But once you’re in a dining area, surely we can all agree that feet should stay on the floor.
There’s casual holiday behaviour, and then there’s making everyone nearby lose their appetite.
Speaking of feet…
7. Using A Fork For Foot Care
Most people use the dinner fork for exactly what you’d expect: dinner.
One passenger aboard a Carnival cruise had other ideas, after being filmed using a fork from the dining room to repeatedly scratch their foot. The video racked up tens of millions of views online, with many viewers immediately wondering one thing: please tell me that fork never went back into circulation.
@luckycharmedcourt Part 2 Foot Fungus Lady on Carnival Cruise using FORKS #carnivalcruise @carnival ♬ som original –
Carnival later said the utensil had been removed from service, although the exact sequence of events became the subject of some online debate after the passenger who filmed it shared follow-up videos.
Either way, it’s probably the strongest argument yet for not thinking too hard about where your cutlery has been before it reaches your table.
Read more: Carnival Responds To Viral ‘Foot Fork’ Video
8. Seagull Spit
This one isn’t from a cruise ship, but a cruise private island. And honestly, it’s made my stomach turn.
I can’t fathom it. Just get fresh pizza, surely? That’s horrendous.
9. Coughing All Over The Buffet
A cruise ship cold can spread fast, especially when people are coughing around shared food, plates and serving utensils.
Nobody expects passengers to hide in their cabin for every tiny sniffle. But if someone is clearly unwell, coughing over food or sitting on a packed excursion bus without covering their mouth is deeply inconsiderate.
Cruises are social holidays. That’s part of the fun. But it also means your germs get to go on holiday too.
10. Bringing A “Poop Sponge” Onboard
Cruise lines have fairly sensible rules about what you can and can’t bring onboard. One item that allegedly didn’t make it through security was an ancient Roman-style hygiene device known as a xylospongium.
If that name means nothing to you, don’t worry. Most people know it by its far less appealing nickname: a “poop sponge.”
A passenger claimed Carnival confiscated the item before boarding after explaining that their family used it as an environmentally friendly alternative to toilet paper. Whether the story was entirely genuine became a matter of debate online, but one thing everyone seemed to agree on was this: some historical inventions are probably best left in history.
At least it didn’t actually make it onboard.
Read more: Carnival Guest Claims Cruise Line Confiscated Family’s ‘Poop Sponge’ Before Boarding
11. Turning The Hot Tub Into “People Soup”
Cruise ship hot tubs can look lovely when they’re empty. But once they’re packed shoulder to shoulder with strangers, drinks in hand, things feel a little less spa-like.
One passenger even claimed they saw someone sneeze and then clear their nose into the hot tub water.
And that’s how a relaxing soak becomes a life choice you regret immediately.
Cruise hot tubs are heavily treated and monitored, but mentally? Some things are hard to recover from.
12. Dripping From The Pool Into The Buffet
One cruiser said they saw a passenger go straight from the waterslide into the buffet, dripping wet, shirtless and towel-free.
It’s not the most horrifying thing on this list, but it’s still grim.
Dining areas have dress codes for a reason. Nobody wants puddles of pool water next to the pasta station, and nobody wants to dodge someone shaking themselves off like a Labrador beside the bread rolls.
13. Vomiting And Carrying On
Cruises involve unlimited food, lots of cocktails and, occasionally, a ship that moves more than expected. So yes, vomiting happens.
But one story involved a woman throwing up on deck, then simply continuing to drink and smoke as if nothing had happened.
That’s commitment, but not the admirable kind.
Crew members are trained to deal with messes quickly and safely, but they shouldn’t have to clean up after passengers who act like the ship is their personal student union bar.
14. Changing A Baby’s Nappy On A Buffet Table
There are baby changing facilities on cruise ships. There are toilets. There are cabins. There are many, many places that are not a buffet table.
This one is especially awful because it’s not just unpleasant – it’s wildly unhygienic.
Look, I’m a mum. I get that it’s not easy. Parents have a lot to juggle on holiday, and cruising with babies can be hard work.
But changing a nappy where people eat? That’s a hard no from everyone.
15. Getting Far Too Romantic In Public
Cruises can be romantic. There are sunsets, cocktails, balconies, warm weather and the lovely feeling of being away from real life.
Some passengers, however, seem to forget the “public” part of public spaces.
There were stories of couples getting carried away on balconies, sofas, pool decks and bars. Which is… a lot.
Nobody is saying don’t enjoy your cruise. Just maybe remember that other passengers didn’t book a ticket to your live performance.
Suggested read: Can You Get Intimate on a Cruise Ship Balcony?
16. Refusing To Leave The Casino For A Toilet Break
This one came up more than once, and I wish it hadn’t.
Some people claimed they’d seen casino passengers have accidents rather than leave their slot machine or table game.
Cruise ship casinos are designed to be exciting, but if you’re choosing a machine over basic bodily functions, it may be time to step away.
Also, spare a thought for the crew who have to deal with the aftermath. They deserve medals. And possibly danger pay.
17. Mystery Poop Incidents Around The Ship
And finally, we reach the bottom. Quite literally.
There were multiple stories about passengers finding human waste in places where human waste should absolutely never be – near lifts, in stairwells, and even inside elevators.
This is the kind of cruise story that sounds made up until you’ve read enough of them and realise, with horror, that apparently it happens more than anyone wants to admit.
Accidents can happen, especially with illness or mobility issues, and those situations deserve compassion. But deliberately leaving a mess and walking away? That’s not an accident. That’s a crime against everyone onboard.
Final Word
The good news is that most cruise passengers are perfectly normal, considerate people who wash their hands, use the tongs and don’t turn the lift into a crime scene.
The bad news is that it only takes one person to ruin a buffet, a hot tub, or your faith in humanity.
Cruise ships themselves are usually very clean, and crew work incredibly hard to keep them that way. So maybe the real lesson here is simple: wash your hands, cover your mouth, use the serving utensils, and for the love of all things nautical, don’t change a nappy near the croissants.
